Apple jokes
1. The desk sergeant answered the phone, and at once a woman began screaming. "...
2. What did one maggot say to the other who was stuck in an apple? Worm your ...
3. Why didn't the two worms go into Noah's ark in an apple? Because everyone h...
4. What lives in apples and is an avid reader? A bookworm !
5. First apple: You look down in the dumps. What's eating you? Second apple: ...
6. What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish? A crab apple !
7. The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.
8. Two boys were eating a snack lunch in the school yard. One had an apple and ...
9. How do you get the most apples at Halloween? Take a snorkel.
10. Fred came rushing in to his Dad. "Dad!" he puffed, "is it true that an apple...
11. School lunches are not generally popular with those that have to eat them, a...
12. How do you make an apple puff? Chase it round the garden
13. How does an apple a day keep the doctor away? When you take careful aim.
14. What is red and goes putt, putt, putt? An outboard apple.
15. Once upon a time there were five apples Which was the cowboy? None - becau...
16. What can a whole apple do that half an apple can't do? It can look round.
17. How do you make an apple turnover? Push it down hill.
18. If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, what does an onion do? Keeps ever...
19. Dad, do you like baked apples? Yes son, why? The orchard's on fire.
20. Two girls were having their packed lunch in the school yard. One had an appl...
21. A Pittsburgh steel worker was driving through northern California's apple co...
22. After a minor mathematical error on a routine report, a worker's boss tried ...
23. Why did the farmer hang raincoats all over his orchard? Someone told him he s...
24. What kind of apple has a short temper? A crab apple.
25. What is the left side of an apple? The part that you don't eat.
26. What kind of apple isn't an apple? A pineapple.
27. What did the apple say to the apple pie? "You've got some crust."
28. What did the worm want to do when he grew up? He wanted to join the Apple C...
29. Why don't apples smile when you go bobbing ? Because they're crab apples !
30. What do you get if you cross a jogger with an apple pie ? Puff pastry !
31. Why did Eve want to move to New York ? She fell for the Big Apple !
32. What did the Gorilla do with the apple he was holding in his hands? He brou...
33. What's the difference between a worm and an apple ? Have you ever tried worm ...
34. What reads and lives in an apple ? A bookworm !
35. If it took six pigs two hours to eat the apples in the orchard, how many hou...